Rilkean heart I looked for you To give me transcendent experiences To transport me out of self and aloneness And alienation into a sense of One-ness and connection ecstatic and magical I became a junkie for it I came looking for the next high And I'm sorry I've been putting the search on the wrong place I understand that you're confused Feeling overwhelmed Well that's a feeling state from then The reality, with cleaning up my emotion of life And I'm getting in touch with myself I'm beginning to ground myself In my own sense of being as an entity One entity on the planet Becoming truly self-reliant and become connected With something beyond me That is where I have to go I'm so sorry I've been putting the search on the wrong place You're lost and don't know what to do But that's not all of you That's your reality today And that is all okay I understand that you're confused, Feeling overwhelmed Well that's a feeling state from then The reality You're lost and don't know what to do But it's not all of you That's the reality today And now it's all okay I understand that you're confused, Feeling overwhelmed Well that's a feeling state from then The reality Rilkean heart We skate like heroes but I hit the wall I watch you stand up, waving while I fall Just give me a hand to get me thru the day Show me your sympathy and I think I'll then be ok Just give me a hand to get me thru the day Maybe I'll still be fine if you don't Cos I'm trying hard to take it all by myself You light up your cheeks while my face is pale A piece of cake, yeah, piece of cake But I failed I stopped talking when I was six years old I didn't want anything more to do with the outside world I was happy being quiet But, of course, they wouldn't leave me alone My parents tried every trick in the book From speech therapists to child psychologists They even tried bribery I could have anything As long as I said it out loud Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Of course this episode didn't last forever I'd made my point and it was time to move on To peel away the next layer of deceit And see what new surprises lay in store My school report said I showed no interest A disruptive influence I felt sorry for them in a way And when they finally expelled me It didn't mean a thing Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it At that time she stopped what she was doing, she stopped playing She stared, she had the facial grimicing, and then the psychiatrist was saying: Julie, Julie, can you hear me? Can you open your eyes? Can you stick out your tongue? And all of a sudden, Julie struck out The November day when I came home The Christmas decorations were already up Spray on snow, coloured flashing lights And an artificial tree that played Silent Night Over and over again My parents welcomed me with loving arms But within an hour were back at each others throats Normal, happy childhood back on course Batteries not included Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it

ill never have this

in Paggi's study and in 4/28 (14.3%) and 1/28 (3-6%), respectively, in ours. These differences may be consequences of differences in laboratory procedures, levels of thyroid hormones in the studied patients, stage of thyroid disease and the level of aCL considered to be of clinical significance. It is likely that the scant number of patients with HT accounts for the elevated prevalence of aCL positivity found in Paggi's study. On the other hand, as mentioned by Paggi and co-workers, aCL in these patients might merely represent a non-specific marker of immune dysregulation. Nonetheless, we think that the interesting paper by Dr Paggi supports our previous suggestion that there is no relation between ATD and the presence of aCL and that, so far, there is no evidence that these antibodies play an important role in the pathogenesis of ATD. Therefore, in our opinion the discussed results and those of other authors (Stagnaro-Green et al., 1990; Petri et al., 1991) strongly suggest that single measurements of aCL in patients with ATD are unlikely to yield diagnostically or prognostically valuable information. J. J. Diez and J. Borbujo Department of Endocrinology, Hospital La Paz, Madrid, Spain References Diez, J.J., Doforno, R.A., Iglesias, P., Sastre, J., Borbujo, J. & Gbmez-Pan, A. (1992) Prevalence of anticardiolipin antibodies in autoimmune thyroid disease. European Journal of Clinical Invesiigaiion, 22 (Suppl.), A1 5. Paggi, A., Caccavo, D., Ferri, G.M., Di Prima, M.A., Amoroso, A., Vaccaro, F., Bonomo, L. & Afeltra, A. (1994) Anti-cardiolipin antibodies in autoimmune thyroid diseases. Clinical Endocrinology, Petri, M., Karlson, E.W., Cooper, D.S. & Ladenson, P.W. (1991) Autoantibodies tests in autoimmune thyroid disease: a casecontrol study. Journal of Rheumaiology, 18, 1529-1531. Stagnaro-Green, A., Roman, S.H., Cobin, R.H., El-Harazy, E., Alvarez-Marfany, M. & Davies T.F. (1990) Detection of at-risk pregnancy by means of highly sensitive assays for thyroid autoantibodies. Journal of the American Medical Association, 40,329-333. 264, 1422-1425. Sirs, Drs J. J. Diez and J. Borbujo report results different from ours on the prevalence of IgG and IgM aCL in autoimmune thyroid disease (ATD). It is possible that the differences may result from differences in laboratory procedures, although we utilized a validated ELISA and we assumed as cut-off values 5 SD above the mean of normal subjects. Moreover, the scant number of patients we have evaluated could account for the different results. Finally, it is pointed out in our results that the rate of positivity was low or moderate for the majority of patients (Paggi et al., 1994). In our study we observed no relation between the presence of aCL and thyroid function status, in agreement with Drs Diez and Borbujo's report. However, among the aCL positive ATD patients we have evaluated, the highest levels of IgG aCL were found in three Graves' disease patients with clinical symptoms and laboratory evidence of severe thyrotoxicosis. In two of them we could demonstrate at the same time the blood was drawn for the aCL assay, a high percentage of CD5' B cells (95 and 46%, respectively; normal values 19 f 5%) (Afeltra et al., 1993). This finding may provide further evidence on the B cell hyperactivity and immune imbalance during thyrotoxicosis. Interestingly, in these two patients the reduction of aCL paralleled that of CD5' B lymphocytes following methimazole treatment (46 and 18%, respectively). In our opinion, however, it is likely that aCL have no role in the pathogenesis of ATD nor do they represent a prognostic factor. A. Paggi, D. Caccavo, G. M. Fed and A. Afeltra" 'Department of Medicina Clinica, Viale Universita 37, 00185 Rome, Italy Noen direkte sammenlikning mellom opptatte og avviste er ikke foretatt. Det som først og fremst hadde interesse, var en jevnføring mellom lektorenes oppfatning av aspirantenes personlige trekk og forutsetninger på den ene side og resultatet fra den tradisjonelle opptakingsprøve på den annen. Mener lektorene at de aspiranter som hevder seg best ved fagprøvingene, også er dem som har de beste personlige forutsetninger, at man med andre ord gjennom fagprøvingene også får de rette i personlig henseende ? Tabeli 3 som sammenfatter en del av hovedresultatene, gjør det klart at det etter lektorenes inntrykk er en meget nær sammenheng mellom fagprøvingsresultat og personlige forutsetninger. Det er definitivt ingen med høye prestasjoner som er ansett personlig uskikket. Likedan er det ingen med lave prestasjoner som er ansett høyt skikket. Denne oppfatning står åpenbart i strid med de undersøkingsfunn som tidligere er nevnt. Det er heller ikke grunn til å anta at det ligger noe bevisst resonnement bak sammenfallet mellom fagprestasjonene og lektorenes inntrykk med hensyn på de personlige trekkEt visst holdepunkt ved vurderingen av spørsmålet om valg av «de rette» vil man også kunne få ved en betraktning av de forutsetninger som kandidatene har når de er ferdige med sin utdanning og skal ta til i yrket. Riktignok har man på dette tidspunkt ikke noen mulighet for å sammenlikne dem med dem som ble awist. Men i hvert fall vil avgjørende mangler i forutsetningene kunne tas som indikasjon på at valget muligens kunne ha vært bedre, dersom da ikke manglene må tilbakeføres til svakheter i selve utdanningen. Formelt sett kan man kanskje si at når kandidaten har fått sin eksamen og er godkjent til læreryrket, skal forutsetningene være i orden. Bruker man dette som kriterium, vil feilvalg praktisk talt ikke forekomme i lærerskolene, knapt nok også ved universitetene og lærerhøgskolene for så vidt regulering av tilgangen måtte være innført. Etter som eksamensbedømmelser er relative i sin karakter mer enn de er absolutte, vil imidlertid dette formelle resonnement ikke være holdbart. Det tør være enighet om at ikke få av dem som er godkjent, står meget svakt, og at det avgjort kan reises spørsmål om deres reelle kvalifikasjoner for et krevende læreryrke. Dette gjelder så vel den faglige og pedagogiske side som de personlige forutsetninger. Hva selve kunnskapsmengden angår, bør det etter de opptaksregler som nå praktiseres, stort sett kunne regnes med at forutsetningene på dette område er i orden, så langt selve utdanningen med hensyn til lengde, dybde og arten av innholdet er adekvat. Utfra de resultater som tidligere er anført, er det likevel grunn til å anta at forutsetningene for en tilfredsstillende tilegnelse og beherskelse av kunnskapsstoffet ikke alltid er til stede. Enkelte av de inntatte aspiranter var åpenbart så svake i sin intellektuelle utrustning at denne antakelse er berettiget. At det ved selve inntakingen likevel er denne siden av forutsetningene som er best tilgodesett, er tydelig nok. Det er også inn 1

i waited 4 years for nothing

you will realize that she can never be yours, not even as a friend. Here, you will have a false hope that someday she would talk to you atleast once in your lifetime and here is where you got trapped. That false hope will remain as a false hope only till the last. She will never talk to you. And the reason for this false hope is that you cannot unlove someone who meant the world to you. You will be in this trap all your life even if you have moved on completely. AHOJMA AEGHOORHMREODH OMPDIRHJODRHI OJNIORPHIJPDHI;JHDJI;H;IJLDTHIJT;DHHDFJIPHDJIOPDHHIDJGHILJHDIJTUHLHTDIJ;kvalifikasjoner I NEED TO GUKFIUNC KIL MYSELS I NEED TO FUICKING OVERDOSE RTIHG NOW AND CUIT AND KIKILLMYSELD I HAYE MT LIFE I GHATRE EVEYRTHIN I CAN TEVEN FUCKING ITA;LK TO P[EOPLE ICA NT TEVE U7NDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK IS HGAPPENING I HATE TH8IS LIGE IB GHATE MY FAMULY, I HATE MY FUICKING SHJIT EXISTENBCE I OI UUJL SHOT YSELC I N I YEARNED FOIR SO LONG O WASTED SO MUCH TIE AI] ACT LIKESHIT IVE ALWAYDS HAD AND ALSAYS WILL I CANMT EVEN DISTRAVCTY MYSELF ITS FO FUCKINGH HATRD I DONT WONT I WONT AVVE TO WOTRRRKYT IF FI KIOL MYSERLD RIHGTR??? IK WONT HGABE TO WORRY THEY DNT HAVE TO AWORRY THEYRE NOT HGONANA BWAOORTYN THEY DONT EVEN GIVE A FIUCK